WARNING!
a deadly post up ahead,
you'll probably think that I didn't write it.



heyhey pepo.

sorry for the disappointment.
there's no photos today D:

ohyeah. this post is very depressing,
so you should probably skip this post and read the previous one.

today i realized my life actually sucks.
yeah.
I'm not good at studies,
not good at volleyball,
er,
not good at respecting people,
especially my friends and all those around me.
I just seem to hurt their feelings again and again,
without actually knowing it sometimes.

it sucks.
it sucks to force a smile today.
especially hard.
maybe i forced a smile because everyone was supporting me,
maybe i forced a smile cause everyone was having fun too,
how could I have spoilt the fun?

i'm only good at being silly.
STUPIDLY silly.
the silly type that makes people frustrated, angry.

i think i've offended everyone I know at least once before.
yeah,
it's not nice to be me.
usually you see a happy, positive side of me.
and let me tell you,
don't get cheated.
that's my shell.
an ugly shell i've been living in.

and inside the shell is me,
really really messed up.

the me i didn't wanna recognise.
so maybe unknowingly,
I've built a shell of fantasy,
a place for me to hide.

but today,
it felt like I fell,
the shell broke,
I was exposed.
maybe no one really realized,
cause no one cared,
or maybe no one was really there to notice.
I saw myself.
I looked like a monster.

the monster that couldn't do anything right,
that doesn't have anything that she thought she had.

my shell of fantasy has broken.
I'm trying hard to fix it.
the pieces doesn't seem to go together,
it is as though it doesn't want me to heal.

everyone should just stay away,
don't tell me jiayou.
don't encourage me.
don't sympathize me.
I just don't want to remember anything while I'm fixing.

turn oblivious.
that's what i'm great at doing.
but inside i'm actually thinking of all the possible ways,
all mostly negative.

I can be a sweet angel,
a silly, clueless girl,
an optimistic person.
when I want to.

I can also throw tantrums,
give attitudes,
become annoyingly emo,
become so pessimistic that you can't stand it.

but this time,
I can seem to choose who I want to let others see.

I solitared through heartbreak,
this time,
I'll try,
to break though my weakness,
my imperfections.

I have no guarantees,
standing as a one dino army,
no support, and the only weapon my heart and mind.

Before they crash and break,
burn and explode,
pray hard that i'll stand again,
to be who I am again.




yes, it's really me.
the valerie that you Don't know.
but it's the same person.

konglong_shasha

winnie the pooh!

here's today's star!
LOL

Hello pepo (:
Erm.
i have nothing to post lah.
HAHA

I dun think i have the time to post the pictures of today,
cause I'll have to search for my USB cable and all.
HAHA

well, monday and tuesday are nothing.
LOL
they went by in a whirl.
LOL

I only rmb monday's training was fun,
jieying and I played together until it was time for free spike.
HEH.

today, school was nothing.
LOL
still didn't do maths.
i forgot to bring back textbook
-.-

well, haven't started studying as I promised myself
-.-
better start soon
x.x

went to wath L.O.V.E (:
with my ethan ruan in it :DDD
and of course, vivian's wangzi.
-.-
HEHE.

post pics tmr,
if I have time.
seriously POK.
declare bankrupt better.
-.-
negative 4 dollars.
STUPID ECONOMY.
-.-

well, it was okay lah.
the climax went higher and higher.
LOL.
wangzi was the grand finale.
-.-
HAHA

okay lah, not bad ;DD

well below are pics at HK.
LOL
ages ago one.
-.-

their MRT
LOL
Look look!
admiralty.
so near yet so far.
xDDD
this is for ferlyn ;D
as compensation for irritating her.
-.-
PANDA
PANDA
PANDA
PANDA <3
LOL!
ocean park!
;DDD
where I saw that damn shuai guy.
the "shit" guy.
LOL.
love at first sight lah.
xDDD


haola,
byee pepooo ;DD

"when you frown, it's an emergency"
"when you cry, it's an emergency"
"simply put, as long as you are unsatisfied with something,"
he paused and whispered,
"it's emergency..."
"to me."
he squeaked.
I laughed, and dried my tears.

chip(:

hello pepo.
good morning?

blehh.
stupid dog.
wake up up again.
-.-

woke up at 8+
brush teeth,
read new moon.
1 chapter :D

LOL
then decided to close the book to blog.
nothing much,
just telling everyone what i'm going to do today.
-.-

cause I won't post on sat or sunday (:

well, after this,
I'm proably going to print pictures.
-.-
oh man.

then edit partner's photos.

finally, if I have time do homework.
D:
sucks man.

going to hospitak to visit grandma again (:
wow.

then going to tp :D
today is friday pepo :DD
get HIGH :DDD

LOL.

Remember peiru went to HK :D
so decided to put up pictures.
LOL
my favourite comes first lahh ^^

dale(:

I was reading the book,
and started to cry.
Because the pain was so familiar,
so familiar that it started to hurt again.
so I decided to close the book.

-you left without a single word, not even sorry-

MissShasha <33

i'm back C-:

hello pepo (:
I'm sorry the blog's dead.
LOL

but i'm back okay :DDD

gosh,
My arms and legs sure are aching.
Like mad.
LOL

let's see what I did in the past 9 days or so...


1st april :
Happy april fools!
we turned our tables to face the back of the class.
MrsTan laughed at it,
but TMM didn't seem to appreciate it.
how impolite.

happy birthday keith (;

2nd april.
I forgot
3rd april
I forgot

4th april
Watched 12 rounds with SHOR :D
HAPPY LIKE A 5 year old that received a huge present ^^
LOL.
well, obviously,
my boyfriend lei.
Heh.
^^'''
Thanks butt :D
there wasn't anyone in the theater.
well, except the bunch of clowns.
._.

5thApril
PARTNER (:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY :D
I'm sorry i didn't post anything on that day D:

6th April.
PARTNER, I felt bad seeing your presents and I didn't give you any.
._.

I'm on it okay.
it's hard.
D:

7th April
idk wat i did.
oh,
went to causeway with viv.
._.

8th april.
Yesterday.
I wanted to post many many stuffs.
and i didn't.
Let's juz summarise.

wrote my post in maths class.
seriously couldn't stand the blabbering.
ohgodness.
it was like shit.
HOLLYCRAPPOBANNASHIT.
I'm serious.
If i didn't write my post,
I might have slept through the whole lesson.
-.-

had PE.
Learnt the passing for relay.
and thank god for that.
you'll know why later in the post.
heh.

oh yeah, I love my class table :D
super COLOURFUL :DD

had supplementary class after sch.
made my attitude very bad.
so reluctant to go to class.
._.

went the 3pm bell rang,
I made a dash for it.
-.-
cause IHTMM.
LOL.
___ sucks.

VB.
trained with seniors.
:D
we had a horrible match.
-.-
6-25
lame shit.
LOL
their spiking and serving really damn diff to receive.
-.-
GDI.


Today :D
oh man.
sports day.
I had to be there early,
cause i dun wanna be late.
LOL
cause I know I wouldn't be let into the stadium
without meeting the teacher-in-charge of latecoming.
-.-
LOL

went for long jump.
it was terrible.
I dunno how to jump
LOL.
and anyhow luh.
-.-

then rest rest.
the long jump went on for very long.
-.-

poor vivan
run here run there
jump here jump there
LOL

went for 4x400 relay :D
fun :D
I was 3rd runner.
with 2 sec1 and mingyuan :D
and we got 3rd.
last minute runners xDD
LOLLOLLOL
not bad lah.

heh.
then went to AMK hub
WATCHED JONAS BROTHERS 3D!!!
ohmyohmyohmy
husbandboyfriendaffair <333
LOL.

xiao.
after that become crazy.
LOL
keep on laughing at the littlest things.
LOL
walked through fairprice and everybody staring at us.
then vivian say she dunno me
LOL
keep laughing at anything she does or say,
or I see or say.
-.-

on the orange juice carton,
it read:
"fresh with sacs"
and i innocently read it aloud.
then vivian was laughing like xiao.
-.-

bought drinks.
mine was nice :D
everytime I start laughing the drink will stop it.
LOL
cool down.
heh.

i forgot the name of the drink lah.
HEH :D
taste like sweets ^^

super happy :DDD
ate ice cream also
SUPER NICE OKAY.
I LOVE ICECREAMS <3
LOL

oh yeah,
the 3D concert never play SORRY DDDDD:
was waiting for it luhhhh DDDDD:

blehhD:

but anyways,
had a happy day :DDDDD


MAO-ey and SILLY
cause it rhymes. xD

oh my, the unglam-ity.
poor vanessa.
also take until her unglam photos.
LOL. like junior like senior. HEH!
boyfriendhusbandaffair.
hollycrappobananaandstrawberrysundaeshit.
they are like OMGosh luh.
hi, long time no see. LOL
cheese!
random picture.
LOL. somehow, this looks like kissing.
oh my. he kissed her cheeks. ._.
^^ in theater
zilian lah. -.- HAHA
oh my!
BAOBEI!
you shrunk. LOL
heh. i guess you returned to normal.
-.-
lame man.
stupid girl.
run and run like xiao.
see lah, make your bag so heavy,
put so many throphies.
LOL

said: the bitch always seems so perfect.
said: well duh, which bitch doesn't seem perfect, honey?
said: that's why I love you sometimes.

heyhey, don't get upset.
next year.
next year you shall win.
no matter who's your opponent then.
he ws just better at the game that moment.
it wasn't your fault , you silly.
now, smile that drop-dead gorgeous smile to me (;

SHASHA

hello pepo (:

today is a free day,
but will still be busy,
so shall post if I have the time later.
LOL

using com at a very slow rate,
because the mouse spoil
-.-

gotta finish decision making,
bathe my dog
do F&N workbook
walk my dog
LOL
if can,
fin DIE.
-.-

HOLLY.
and do xinny's present.
(;

I owe you lah.
sry pepo :D
always owe birthday presents
-.-
DD:

later!

shasha