thanks for your concern,
I'll get back soon.

just stop asking me what happened?
you two break ah?

it's just opening the wound that i've closed.

I think i shouldn't be using com uh.

shall not use com any longer,
shall stop staring at the phone.

byebye.

the fact is that I miss you and I can't let you go.

hello pepo,

relax, Valerie Yuen Yi Yue hasn't kicked the bucket yet (:

I still haven't managed to learn how to smile though.

smiling through the tears are ugly D:

hah, my dust bin has been cleared once

because it was filled with tissues.

now it's filling up again.

seriously.

my mom says I'm to weak for one.

people says, I was too into it.

maybe I regretted starting it at first,

but i didn't regret continuing it.

but again, I did something wrong and ended it

then regretted it.

I cannot blame anyone else uh.

I initiated my own heartbreak (:

(dun blame him or anything uh.)

that's silly.

not called shasha for nothing (:

I still dun understand why all the smileys though.

):

saddies aren't that nice anymore.

it only makes me rmb of everything

then i'll cry again.

I can't do anything now.

there are too many marks of ___.

its everywhere.

how unfair.

you could be allowed to move on.

but i had to still stay in that circle.

love,

is only a chapter

in a guy's life.

but to a girl,

it's the whole book.

you've probably moved on to the next chapter.

the chapter maybe abt friendship,

career/ studies,

or another relationship.

I don't know.

I won't know anymore.

I miss

I think

I cry

I regret

& I wail.

and stop.

I miss again

I think again

I cry again

I regret again

& I wail again

and the whole cycle will start.

I wonder how long this can last.

the room seems so quiet now.

nothing seems colourful anymore.

the clicking of the mouse,

the tapping on the keyboard.

sounds like glass cracking.

yup, it sound exactly like my heart.

I've not heard this sound for 4 months and 16days.

maybe I shouldn't have stepped out of fantasy;

of my fairytale.

I didn't knew the cold hard reality.

I seriously dun wanna whine here.

but i just could stand it.

maybe i'm stepping back into the old old past.

I'm never coming out.

neither for a billionaire,

nor a prince on a white horse.

I'll read the same storybook over and over again

the story book labeled:

Valerie's life in reality.

I'll read over and over the life i had

for 4 months.

and remind myself,

never to step out of fantasy.

my life will continue,

with scars.

with inner injuries.

with a hole in my heart.

haha,

seriously,

have you ever has the feeling that inside your ribs,

it's empty?

it's the exact same feeling.

it's not the feeling of

someone clenching on your heart

when you feel jealous.

or the super fast thudding of your heart

when he comes.

it's like...

your heart isn't there anymore.

my heart fell sick on september 20th.

and it died on september 21st.

you'll be my first and my last,

as long as my heart

is still seeking for you again.

SHASHA;

left on 21st september

she never smiled since 20september.

finally lost her smile on 21 september.

doctors had no choice,

in order to save her,

they had to tear out her silly brain

and naive heart.

doctors couldn't help her,

because

of course without her silly brain

and naive heart;

the real shasha would die.

but they did their best.

she didn't want to live on

without her silliness and naiveness

so she left the world empty.

bellbell;

shasha no more.

smile away the hole in your heart.

smile girl,
smile that hole in that heart away.
forget gummies,
forget the 459 dandelions,
forget love.

smile even though it's through your tears.
it's time you smiled.

4months 16days.
dearest girl, your first love has ended.

two lovers that loved each other,
why did they have to end?

maybe I haven't noticed,
but it's impossible
to smile without you anymore.

b.i.t.c.h.e.s

hello pepo(:

short post :D

have to mug quickly :D

ugh.

I wish sch could stop for us to mug x)

easier to mug mah x)

anyways,

I will start doing maths tutor!

*motivated * :D

oh wells.

byee :D

05.06 Partners <3

aiyah, bitch, i still love you lah,

I love monkey more than that panda, humph, doesn't matter!

;P

HELLo (:

long time no post.
._.

LOL!
everything's dead uhh

EOY coming!!
must jiayou jiayou :D

get into a gd class and dun regret :D
2more weeks to study b4 it starts ._.

I can't get any of maths book A at all.
totally forgottened.
._.

haix,
jiayou bah,
lookin forward to meet KAELYN :DD

was talking to movin just now,
HE SPOILT MY BOTTLE!
he's damn funny one okay. -.-
he wanted to buy a new bottle for me.
I didn't want to accept uh.
I told him the bottle was free from ribena(:
then he say nvm, take as belated prezzie.
then in the end, I told him:
you wan buy, go buy ribena and give me the bottle (:
and he was like:
win alr loh.

LOL!

heee, off to do other stuffs (:
byee pepo :D
somehow, I miss my bitches(;